good article, thanks.
There is no trick to being a good father; however, fatherhood is whatever you put into it. It comes without saying: all men have the potential to be and become great fathers, but not many succeed to an acceptable plateau. It has also been said that males are in general, busier than their female counterparts; but still, the truth remains, a schedule should not take precedence over spending quality time with your family. Corporate America will not tell you this, but family comes first, not the big job or highfalutin careers. Is this you? Ask yourself: is there anything, that I can do to be a better father to my child or children?
Also, ever wonder why some kids grow up not knowing their fathers, or show resentment toward them, even though they share the same house? Notice, I said house, not home. It is important that we distinguish the difference between house, and a home. A house is nothing more than just a building or shelter, or a place where you live. On the other hand, a home is an environment that is designed to foster the enhancement of life and happiness of those within it. Also, a home is always conducive to growth, love, caring, and sharing. Unlike a home, you can still live in a house and not do any of the above mentioned.
Here Is The Problem: The problem is because most "men-fathers" do not see the importance and or rewards in fatherhood. I call them "men-fathers" because some are men, many are fathers, but most do not know which role to play. So they put everything before the most important aspect of their lives, and hope for the best and for things to work themselves out. Bottom line, they will not unless you make it work. It must also be known that the male is the head of the female, and is therefore the head of the household. With that being said, males play a crucial role in the development of the offspring. Yes, the mother does too, but their roles are different. They nurture the offspring, while providing the atmosphere for love and harmony. In other words, they are the glue that holds the pieces together. A male may set the stage, and gather the pieces, but it is the female, or in this case, the mother which is the keeper.
Here Is The Mistake: No one is more important than the other; thus, never make this mistake by saying "mother is more important than father, or vise versa. Both parents are highly important in providing a great life for the offspring(s) and each other.
Here Is The Solution: Top 20 Steps to being a better dad.
* Before the baby is born, massage her feet and rub her belly
* Pray, and read to the baby and talk to him/her so he can know your voice
* You must go into the labor room with her, stay, and do not pass out
* You must first love yourself before you can love someone else (simple, but important)
* Learn and love to read (for self-improvement and to acquire knowledge to protect your family)
* See yourself as a creator of things, people and ideas
* Be a team player, know your role and its importance
* Support your wife, or the mother of your child/children
* Be brave and showoff your handy-man-ship around the home (it builds confidence in the female toward you)
* Try to fix things yourself before hiring external help (it makes you a better leader)
* Do not be afraid of poop, yes, poop
* Be willing to learn and change dirty diapers
* Participate in bathing your child and putting him/her to bed
* Sharpen your lullaby singing skills (it helps when putting them to sleep)
* Never wait to be told the following; we need: (diapers, formula, baby oil and power)
* Take initiative, keep a keen eye on overall household products
* Always keep an emergency stash of cash somewhere (only you should know)
* Always pay your bills on time, preferably one week in advance
* Use a calendar to schedule important dates (bills, doctor visits, birthdays)
* Never ask your wife or the child's mother for money, only if you just have to-you shouldn't because you always have emergency funds (EF)
Finally, in your pursuit to becoming a better father, do not forget, all things are possible to them who believe and work toward any desired goal. Your goal might be to spend more time with your son or daughter, or even, remember their birthdays, like Jack Nicholson in the movie "The Bucket List." It's a start. And who said you have to be perfect the first time around; no one! So why not start today? Be the hero of your family and not the zero.